


Queen of Denial

by Motorcyclegrrl



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Coming Out Almost, Denial, F/F, Falling In Love, Femslash, Truth
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-29
Updated: 2016-06-29
Packaged: 2018-07-18 22:24:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,033
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7333063
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Motorcyclegrrl/pseuds/Motorcyclegrrl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kara works so hard to appear normal. She even put her super powers away for years, so she could fit in. Kara is the Queen of Denial. It's like a superpower with her, and it will take the Queen of all Media to show her a truth she is denying.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Queen of Denial

**Author's Note:**

> I was inspired by a lot of things coming together on this one. My own life experience, an Emily Andras interview I read recently, and the many wonderful posts I read on Tumblr from wlm who are very much aware and not in denial at all.

Cat Grant had it on good authority that James Olsen and Kara Danvers had broken up. Kara never seemed to keep a relationship with a man for very long. Cat thought about all the times she had caught Kara checking her out. Sure, Cat was too smooth to let Kara know she knew, but Cat was certain Kara found her attractive. And Kara was always there for her, staying late at work, saving her from danger, and my God did she get nervous anytime Cat came close and gave her even the slightest physical attention. 

In all this time neither of them had made a move. Not even Supergirl had, other than that one hug. Oh Dear Lord! Cat remembered that hug. The hug of all hugs at what could have been the end of all things. She had been so disappointed when Supergirl had let go of her. She'd wanted to kiss her right then and there. 

Looking through the glass walls of her office, she looked at the empty desk where Kara had sat for so long. It had been so distracting having her sitting so close. All Cat had to do was whisper her name and she would come into her office smiling her sunny smile. Oh how she missed calling her close just so she could get a closer look, smell her cheap perfume, eat her alive with her eyes, and make rude remarks about her clothing to cover up the very real desire to remove her clothing entirely.

Cat realized now the clothing was part of the disguise. The attempt to look normal, to not draw attention, anything to appear common, ordinary, and certainly not special. Kara tried so hard to appear normal, to not stand out flying under the radar was like an obsession with her. Suddenly Cat had an epiphany, the light bulb came on, and it was a 50 megawatt bulb as bright as the sun. Cat was stunned and blinded temporarily as she tried to digest and assimilate this new information. She knew beyond a doubt, Kara Danvers, aka Supergirl. was gay and very attracted to Cat, but didn't realize it. Gay was not considered ordinary. Gay stood out, and Kara was obsessed with being NOT special. So she rejected subconsciously that she was gay in the same way she had rejected her superpowers. She wanted to fit into the dominantly heterosexual world thus not standing out. 

What to do with the new thought? Cat mused on it for a while. Cat herself was bisexual. She’d dated men and women, having no preference one over the other except that she was deeply in love with Kara Danvers, and no one else was remotely appealing, since she’d hired her. Cat had hoped the feelings would go away, however they had grown and continued to do so. In fact Kara was always in Cat's mind. She had to fight constantly to concentrate on work. It was so easy to just drift off and be consumed with a daydream of kissing Kara on her balcony, or bedding her. Removing her clothing was a recurring theme, secretly burning the cardigans afterward entered into the fantasy more often than not. 

A relationship with Kara would help Cat concentrate at work. It would also stop all the torment and suffering she was going through as a result of her unrequited desires. She was rich. She was powerful. Even if Kara wanted children, Cat could afford it. Maybe she’d get the daughter she always wanted. It would be good for Kara. Emotional stability was important for Supergirl to be in top form. Cat had gone over and over the negatives in her mind for over a year now, and right at this moment she gave no fucks. The torment she was in over her feelings for Kara made her ignore good sense and logic and her age. 

So what to do? How to proceed? She couldn't just walk up and say Kara, you lesbian, I'm in love with you, let's date. She couldn't just grab her and kiss her, not with her being in denial. How could the Queen of All Media reach the Queen of Denial? Truth, Cat cornered the market on showing people the truth, what they did with it was up to them, but she relied on her readers and viewers to be smart. Kara was smart. Cat would show her the truth and then count on Kara to be the intelligent girl she was.

Epiphany day just happened to be Friday, and everyone was clearing out as soon as they could. Cat decided to move the process along. She got up and went to her personal elevator and left. Actually she just rode it down and then back up. When she arrived back at the top, the place was deserted. She went back to her desk and sat. She decide to start by testing her theory. Very quietly she spoke, “Kara come here.” She looked at her watch. It took 35 seconds for Kara to appear. She walked into Cat's office, “You called for me?" 

“Yes, come here.”

Kara walked over and stood beside Cat's chair. Cat reached out a hand. “Help me up?”

Kara took Cat's hand and gave a tug. Cat stood, keeping her grip on Kara's hand, and said, “Let's go out on the balcony, so I can show you something.” Cat led the way, still holding onto Kara's hand. By this time Kara was a bundle of nerves. Electricity was buzzing in her hand and shooting up her arm. 

It was still daylight, and the afternoon view was of rush hour traffic. Cat sat on a couch and pulled Kara down. “Sit with me.”

By this time Kara was in a near panic. Cat always made her nervous and when she touched her, Ooh Rao the electricity was like bolts of lightning. Her stomach did flip flops, and she found it strangely hard to breath. Kara sat. Cat let go of her hand.

Cat looked at her, but Kara was looking anywhere but at Cat. “Kara I need you to look at me. You aren't in any trouble. I just need to talk to you, to show you something. Please look at me.” Cat's voice was sincere and soft, and Kara managed to look at her. “What I'm going to show you may make you want to fly off, and if you need to I understand. That's why I brought you out here. I don't want you to feel trapped. This isn't a trap, just some truth. If you do need to leave before our conversation is over, know that you are welcome to come to me anytime day or night to finish it. It's important to me, and I will wake up 3am if you need me too.”

Kara was worried now. What in the world was Cat going to talk to her about. Well Cat said she wasn't in trouble, how bad could it be?

“This is going to be personal, and you don't have to answer me. I'm not being the boss here just Cat. Here we go, I make you nervous. It's a statement of fact. I've seen you stand up to villains much scarier than I will ever be, so I know it isn't fear. Kara you aren't afraid of me.”

Kara looked down. She was afraid of Cat or rather being this close to Cat.

“I think you are afraid of how you feel when you’re near me. You freeze up when I even suggest that I'm going to touch you. Why is that?”

Kara glanced up at Cat. She had no words. She tried to have words. Cat put her fingers on Kara's lips. “Shhhhhh, don't try to answer, just think about it.” Kara's lips tingled from the soft touch of Cat's fingers.

“Are you afraid of what you feel when I touch you?” Cat's voice was low, and it went through Kara like a bolt of lightening. Kara's face was beet red by this time. Cat was right. Kara was very afraid of what she felt when Cat touched her or worse the times she had held Cat in her arms.

“I want you to answer this next question. When you date a man and hold his hand, do you feel what you do when you hold my hand?” Cat purposely picked up Kara's hand again and gave it a squeeze.

Electricity shot up each woman's arm, and Kara didn't know what to say. Cat prompted her, “Just the simple truth, yes or no.”

Kara managed a quiet, “No.” 

And do you feel more holding my hand or a male dates hand?

There was no doubt Kara felt so much more when Cat touched her. These questions were so uncomfortable. She thought about flying away, not answering. Cat knew that she would that's why she had brought it up. “Cat where is this going?”

“If you answer my question and don't fly off on me, you'll find out. There are no wrong or right answers, just the truth. Now, more or less when I hold your hand?”

“More” Kara looked down, embarrassed.

Cat felt like she was torturing the poor girl, but carried on. “How much more? On a scale of one to ten, one being no feelings, and ten being more feelings than you ever thought possible.”

Kara gripped Cat's hand tighter. Cat was making light swirls with her thumb on the top of Kara's hand. Kara cleared her throat. Why in the world was Cat asking this? To make matters worse, Cat brought up her free hand and began to lightly play with Kara's hair, straightening it and finger combing through it. Kara didn't want to answer. The answer was stuck tight in her chest.

“I can see this one is tough. I will make you a deal, Kara. You can ask me any question, and I will answer it in payment for your answer.”

“Pre-payment?”

“Ok, Pre-payment. Ask me anything.”

“Answer what you asked me. On a scale of one to ten what does it feel like when I hold your hand?”

Cat's eyes opened wide in surprise. She grinned. Kara was turning the tables on her. “Well played. The answer is ten, more feeling than I ever thought possible.” Cat gripped Kara's hand in encouragement and smiled warmly at her.

It was Kara's turn to show surprise. She never expected that answer, maybe what she was feeling wasn't so out of place after all. “I - I - ahem.” She pulled her hand away from Cat and held up her hands, fingers splayed wide. Cat spoke for her, “Ten”. Kara dropped her hands to her lap and looked at them. She felt incredibly uncomfortable, and yet strangely she couldn't have left the balcony if she had tried. 

“Now on that same scale what do you feel when a male date holds your hand.”

Kara thought. Dating men had been so hard for her. It was distressing really. Was she allowed to give a negative number? “Negative 2?”

Cat spoke, “What do you think that means? Don't answer that just think about it.”

Cat leaned forward into Kara's space. Her mouth was near her ear, so near she could feel her breath hot on her neck. “Kara can I kiss you here?” Cat touched a spot on her cheek with a finger. Kara shyly shook her head yes. Cat kissed her cheek lingering for only a moment before pulling back. Kara gasped out loud at the shock from the kiss. She could still feel it burning on her cheek after Cat pulled away. She raised her hand to her cheek and touched the spot. It felt normal to the touch, but still it tingled.

“Now in the spirit of fairness, would you like to return the kiss?” Cat turned her cheek to Kara and hoped this wasn't going too far too soon. Kara took the bait and quickly kissed Cat's cheek. The skin was unexpectedly soft, and it made Kara's lips tingle.

The kiss made quite the impression on Cat, and while her heart beat had been fast it was racing now. Kara was well aware of this, and it added to the emotional overload she was feeling.

“You are doing brilliantly, Kara.” Cat tried to reassure her. Clearly this was overwhelming for the girl. Hell it was overwhelming for Cat. “Now on that scale of one to ten how would you rate that peck on your cheek?”

“You first.”

“Ok, I give it a ten. It surprised me actually.”

Kara finally picked up her head and looked into Cat's eyes. She wasn't sure what she was looking for but somehow she wasn't feeling as shy and embarrassed anymore. Apparently Cat was feeling everything she was. Very softly she she said, “Ten”.

Cat didn't say anything, she just squeezed Kara's hand. Hoping beyond hope that Kara was able to be smart, and that the truth, now that she'd shown it to her, would win through. Finally Cat leaned forward and pressed her forehead to Kara’s. She lightly kissed Kara's cheek, then she kissed the other cheek. She paused with her lips just millimeters away from Kara’s. Cat held her ground. She wanted to smother Kara with her lips, but she needed Kara to chose, to come to her.

Kara hesitated. Did Cat really want this? Did she want her to kiss her? Kara wanted it. _Oh My God, I'm gay for Cat, so gay._ That realization pushed her over the edge, and she closed the small gap between their lips. The tingling was incredible, and her stomach flopped. Cat took things from there. Now that Kara had chosen, Cat gently pressed the kiss a little further, not willing to pull away yet. She was so afraid Kara would panic and bolt. When their lips parted Cat gently wrapped her arms around Kara and pulled her into a hug, holding her close. Kara's arms wrapped around Cat and even though the feelings coursing through her body were new and overwhelming, she wanted to be closer to Cat.

Cat couldn't help herself. Kara's cheek and neck were right there. She began lightly kissing her way across young blonde’s ultra soft cheek and down her neck. Kara whimpered and shook in Cat's arms causing Cat to pull her in even closer. Kara began to trade kisses with her, a kiss on the neck for a kiss on the neck, a kiss on the cheek for a kiss on the cheek. Soon their lips were locked together, and Cat suspected if her heart raced much more she'd die from the excitement. 

Kara pulled away finally, “Cat?” She gasped out looking turned on but very confused. “Why?”

There was a lot of answer to that one word question. Where to begin? Cat hesitated, took a breath. “So many reasons, I can't keep pretending, denying my feelings.” Cat took a deep breath, held it, and let it out. “Letting the truth out feels good.” She reached out and ran her fingers through the whisps of Kara's hair. Kara caught her hand and kissed the palm pressing it against her face. 

Kara's whole body tingled, and she felt a euphoria she had never known. Cats touch felt so good, and kissing Cat was better than anything she'd ever felt, even flying. Being here in Cat's arms was overwhelming but also the most natural, normal feeling she'd ever had. She existed only in the moment, and she kissed Cat again and again. 

When they finally came up for air, Cat spoke, “It's Friday night, and it's late. Fly me home?”

Kara smiled and stood. She changed into her super suit. Reaching out a hand she pulled Cat to her feet, and scooped her into her arms. Cat should have called for a car. Kara was in no condition to fly. Her concentration was blown, replaced by her new found passion for kissing Cat and holding her close. Flying with Cat in her little gay arms was overloading her emotions, and she couldn't even focus on where they were going. Cat realized her mistake not long after they left the Catco balcony. It was a good thing Cat knew where she lived because Kara would never have gotten them there on her own. After a few close calls with tall buildings, Cat convinced Kara to fly higher over the buildings. When they touched down on her bedroom balcony at the penthouse, Cat broke into a giggle fit, and pulled Kara into her bedroom. “You need to sit down.” Cat pointed to the bed. “Sit.”

Kara sat.

“If I didn't know better, I would think you were drunk.” Cat was still chuckling.

Supergirl stood up and in a few steps she was towering over Cat. Blue eyes looking so serious. “I'm sorry if I scared you. I've never felt this way before, it's very distracting.” Supergirl played with Cat's hair, just barely touching it, and then ghosted her fingertips across Cat's too soft cheeks. She smiled big and said, “I used to feel like something was missing, and I thought it was Krypton or my family. Cat, I've found what I was missing. You showed me today. I feel whole and relaxed and just good. I feel full here,” and she touched her chest over her heart. She leaned down and kissed Cat, warm soft lips giving way to a wet open mouth kiss, hot and deep. 

Cat pulled back after a while and turned away a little. "You know Kara when I asked you to fly me home, it really didn't dawn on me that you'd be all dressed up as Supergirl when we got here. God, this is hot.” Cat unbuttoned her blouse and tossed her bra over her makeup chair. She let her skirt drop, and it ended up over the chair too. Kara stood there gaping like an idiot in her Super Suit at Cat who was now dressed in just an unbuttoned silk shirt and slip. Cat took her by the hand and led her to the bed. “Come,” Cat beckoned as she slipped into the bed. “Boots off.”

**Author's Note:**

> The response on this warms my heart. Thank you everyone who left kudos, commented, and bookmarked. I felt insecure when I posted this one, but feel insecure no more. :D


End file.
